I Got Nothing Else Going On: What's bigger than an elephant, has horns, and is causing a decrease in tourism in the Middle East?

Road tripping with the Europeans
to East Jordan

Sometimes I get to thinking that I am just not that interesting, and then I spend 4 hours in a car with some Europeans who have travelled the world, speak multiple languages, have really cool jobs, and it turns out they are real boring Boracks.

In any case - alternatively, I have met some real kindred spirits here in the Middle East...a felucca captain who likes to be called Captain Rambo, a train conductor who prefers to be called Zorro, numerous Mohammeds, Machmouds, Ibrahims, and Nassers, and a bedouin who spied for the US in Iraq (not a very good spy, if you ask me, but he does make a mean cup of tea). Plus, watching Dena work her wiles has been a true learning experience. Somehow she will not only refuse to pay someone baksheesh, but she will actually win them over while doing it - occasionally inspiring a marriage proposal from across the Nile ("DENA, I LOVE you!!!!"). Amazing. Let's get her in there with the much beloved, Celine Dion, and get some real peace work done, people.

In no way did I have nearly enough time do see everything one should see, so don't ask about the following as it will only spark within me a pang of regret and longing....Abu Simbel, Wadi Rum, Alexandria. I will just have to come back if anyone is up for it. Fitz kids? Anyone?

I did get quite a rush from some of the things I did see, though...Petra!!!!!!!!!!!!, Karnak temple, some castles ideal for playing man-hunt, Dead Sea (which is way smaller than I thought - Israel, a mere stone's throw away, could catch the glare off my bare belly) , tomb heiroglyphics still in color after 4000 years, Tut's treasures, Nubian villages on the Nile, Cairo markets, etc. Love, love love.

I am going to pack up my bootleg seasons of The Wire, have 2 or 3 more desserts here in Amman, and call it a day.

Oh yeah - what's bigger than an elephant, has horns, and is causing a decrease in tourism in the Middle East? A pig. As in swine flue. Yeah, Dena and I are still trying to figure that one out, but we are guessing maybe the guy who was trying to describe this to us has never seen an actual pig.