I Got Nothing Else Going On: This camel very FASHT!

...as was repeated to me several times by my guide Raju. "You OK. No problem? Only problem Pakistan." Intrigued by this statement, I probe to get hear more of his viewpoint on Indian-Pakistani relations or the current Musharraf situation. To which he responds, "This camel very FASHT." Maybe he has something there.

The camel fair comes to Pushkar this weekend, but I leave today back to Jaipur. Luckily, a lot of the camels come early, so I was able to ride a camel through the market up to the fair. Slowly seeing a few camels on the street and then more as we left the market and then even more until the entire landscape was a sleeping, eating, spitting mass of animals is something I will never ever get over. People outnumbered by humps. As a note, steering a camel is a lot easier than maneuvering, oh, I don't know, say a paddleboat in Amsterdam. A lot less screaming and less laborious.

I am here for such a short time, but India certainly has kicked me in the keister. The NY mask works well to keep touts and people from bothering you for too long, but it is impossible to be indifferent here. For better or worse, you feel very alive, running the gamut of emotions.

Fear - what sort of medical attention would I receive if I was trampled by this elephant? Do you think that monkey has rabies?
Elation - stepping barefoot onto the steps of a building that is so beautiful, I force Chris and Meghan to take pictures of me with it from every possible angle. The Indians also really know how to build a fort, in the same way Europeans really know how to wear a scarf.
Frustration - women trying to grab your hands as if to shake it hello but inevitably trying to sneak henna on it so you will have to give her money
Anger/being heartbroken - the same woman asked me through an English-speaking friend how much the bill a man gave her for dancing was worth. After seeing the green bill with the numbers $100,000 in the corners and the statute of liberty where a president would normally be, I had to tell her the bill wasn't real. The disappointment in her face nearly broke me. And I wanted to find the man that gave it to her and beat him down.
Sympathy - it is annoying to be bothered constantly, but I walk around and am seen as a dollar sign or one of those coin games at the fair where the money is juuuust about to be pushed over the side to score a lucky someone a small windfall. I figure if I saw that potential, wouldn't I also stand there pestering, waiting to grab whatever was inevitably going to fall out?
Confusion - I can't be totally sure as I could only understand about 67% of what he said, but I think the driver to Jaipur, in addition to telling inappropriate jokes involving a mouse and an elephant and mocking Japanese tourists, was inquiring as to the sexual habits and menstruation cycles of western women. This guy obviously did not realize that I am about as open as a the Brahman temple to non-Hindus (not very). I prefer to tell my family I will be visiting a foreign country only when I am surrounded by that language and stepping over the indigenous animals' poo. Apparently, he had the same misunderstanding my mom had of what exactly "having been around the block" means.
Relief - dealing with men all day, hearing only Hindi, having to lie about my name, country, marital status as if I was Sidney Bristow on Alias, I struggle with the sad fact that coming back to the hotel and catching the Lizzie McGuire movie on TV is the only thing that will make me whole again.
Guarded - shirking off the "Namaste, what country you from?" as sadly, as much as I would like to talk to this person and get to know what their life is like, money will always be the elephant in the room (well maybe something less common in India, like a kangaroo or something)
Familiarity - finding wonderful travelers from Holland and Portugal with whom I can debrief and invite to visit me in New York in exchange for their salvation. Running into my friend Patchu from the safari and having him walk me around the fair today.

All this as well as excitement, indigestion, loneliness, spirituality....at the risk of getting too deep, I am going to head out to see the last of the camels before the power shuts down again in here.

Oh, and although Ayo Technology (in addition to Om Shanti Om) will always be my Indian anthem, I am still pure Kanye.

Jaipur